Worn || Ready or Not

I’m a week away from my 50th birthday and I have so many feelings about it; very few are good. I desperately want to be one of those people who celebrate their birthdays for the entire month but I can’t remember ever being happy about getting older.

Not to get all “therapy” speak, but I’m certain it’s because I rarely give myself permission to exist and enjoy the present. I’m either punishing myself for the past or anxiously trying to micromanage the future.

My goal for the week is to live in this moment. Enjoy the person I am right now. appreciating the life I have is so much more than I ever imagined it could be. 50 is on the horizon, ready or not.

dress here || bag here || shoes here || jacket vintage\thrifted || necklace here

Worn || Gingham Style

August is a weird month. Many people are focused on getting themselves or their kids ready to return to school, so there’s always a little hope that comes with fresh starts and new school supplies.

I have an August birthday and this month has always been about endings. The end of another trip around the sun. The end of those long sun-drenched days filled with possibility. So long summer romance. Goodbye to my golden summer tan.

I’m going to do everything I can to hold on to the last few glorious days of summer, embrace the sweetness of August and reflect on my last few weeks as a fortysomething.

Worn || Hi Barbie!

Saturday my daughter treated me to a movie. We got dressed up in our pink to see the Barbie movie. The movie and afternoon out with one of my girls were an unexpected delight.

There have been a million think pieces written about this movie. I don’t know if I have anything more to add to the conversation. It was funnier than I thought it would be while being unexpectedly deep. The final scene between Barbie and the creator of Barbie, Ruth Handler (played by the brilliant Rhea Perlman) is the one that made me sob and leave the theater with a tear-streaked face. It was beautifully shot. The set design was fantastic. The wardrobe department hit it out of the park. And, I didn’t think I could love Ryan Gossling more, then I saw him crying shirtless in a faux mink coat and a sweatband. The choreographed Kens dance/fight scene is worth the price of the ticket alone! Seriously, get all dolled up in your version of Barbie and go see it. Then grab a Barbie drink after to discuss how amazing it was.

Starbucks Vanilla Frappucino with Dragon Fruit

Find the skirt here ||the dress(worn as tank) here || the bag here

Similar shoes here || jacket here

Loss and Living

If you follow me on any of my other platforms you know that my father passed away on May 23. Once again, life has served up a full plate of sadness, disbelief, grief, and anger…anyone who’s lost someone they love deeply knows what I’m talking about.

Loss changes you. Everything, every interaction is now viewed through the lens of it. The world keeps spinning and all you want to do is press pause. How can I be expected to be me when my heart has two giant parent-shaped holes in it? Daddy’s girl suddenly without him.

I have a loving husband, great kids, and an amazing group of friends, but something about being a parentless child makes the ground beneath me feel unsteady. Typically, I would spend the day with him on Wednesdays because I don’t have my grandson that day. There hasn’t been a Wednesday since he’s been gone that I haven’t found myself getting ready to visit only to realize that he’s gone making the pain of the loss fresh again.

My dad liked to say, “Life is for the living”, a phrase that confused me as a kid. Now, I understand it. That understanding comes tinged with sadness because what it really means is that you have to let go. You cannot stay blanketed in grief making your life a shrine to that pain. We only get this one life, and my dad would want me to live it.

Here I am Daddy, trying to figure all of this out without you.

Joseph R. Garr June 5, 1930- May 23, 2023

“Say not in grief ‘he is no more’ but in thankfulness that he was.”

– Hebrew Proverb

Worn|| Yellow

Trigger warning: This post refers to an eating disorder and body image struggles. If these topics are difficult for you to read about, you may want to skip this post.

Be gentle with yourself. I’ll see you next time.

Lately, I’ve been reading a lot about body neutrality. As someone who suffered from an eating disorder for more than a decade and has had body dysmorphia and a really shit body image for my entire adult life, body positivity was close to impossible for me to wrap my brain around. However, body neutrality focuses on appreciating what your body can do instead of what it looks like. This approach may not work for everyone but it’s working for me.

In a move that feels very Goop/New Age/Boss Babe-like, I’ve started writing down a few body-neutral affirmations a week. I know that I’m essentially using affirmations as a rebuttal to all the negative self-talk in my head, but it still feels awkward, cultish, and more than a little cringe.

All of that aside, two of the affirmations I wrote down this week to focus on are:

  • I will accept the body that I have right now.

  • I deserve to wear clothes I like.

I have had this skirt for five years. I found it in a thrift store and had to buy it because sequins(obviously) and yellow is my favorite color. It’s been hanging in my closet for five years because it was too big when I bought it and I didn’t have a tailor I trusted enough to fix it for me. It’s now a perfect fit. This revelation is something that would have sent the old me into a spiral of depression and self-loathing.

But today I’m choosing to revel in the fact that the body I have right now is perfect for this skirt that I absolutely adore!

Nothing here is new. The skirt was thrifted five years ago, and the shirt was thrifted last year. The jacket and the shoes are older than my youngest kid. I still like each individual piece and collectively this outfit made me feel a little like my old self. It’s good to know that I haven’t buried the old too deep. She’s still in there somewhere!

Worn|| Cuff It

Having lived through the 1980s when mom jeans were simply called jeans because they were the only style available, I was sure that “mom jeans” was a trend I would avoid, especially since mom jeans aren’t always flattering to mom bodies.

::Dollhouse high-waisted jeans have entered the chat. ::

They are stretchy and comfortably hold in that annoying lower stomach pooch that has decided it’s here to stay. I love that I throw a wide cuff on them and they are the perfect length for almost any pair of shoes I decide to wear.

Speaking of shoes, I didn’t get these until late last summer so I didn’t get much wear out of them before it was boot season. However, I think they are my new favorites.

*This post contains affiliate links and I may earn a small commission if you click the link at no additional cost to you. As an Amazon affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases if you choose to shop through my links.

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Jeans similar here Top here Shoes here Cardigan similar here

Worn|| Such a Slacker

My quest for more simple things to wear that aren’t leggings led me to The Dream Factory, aka, the thrift store. It really is the place where sartorial dreams come true. I have $100 Antrhopologie Dress that I bought for $7 and $10 sequin JCrew skirt to prove it.

Anyway, the goal of this specific trip was to find pants specifically slacks. Since I wanted them to have a baggier fit while still being tailored, I hit up the men’s department. I especially love shopping for pants in the men’s section because the fashion industry allows men to have an assortment of lengths for their pants and I don’t have to worry about getting them hemmed. I snagged these Hagar Collection men’s trousers for $5. I paired it with another thrift favorite, the vintage Ms. Pacman shirt that I bought at Goodwill for a whopping $1.50 on a half-off tag day.

Because no outfit lately feels complete without a pair of kicks, I’m wearing my Stan Smith Adidas. I used to spend my free time searching for and most of my paychecks buying a pair of killer high heels. I currently have five pairs of sneakers on my wish list. Life is weird like that.

Ms. PacMan Shirt similar here Trousers similar here Jean Jacket similar here Kate Spade Tote Stan Smith Adidas

*This post contains affiliate links and I may earn a small commission if you click the link at no additional cost to you. As an Amazon affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases if you choose to shop through my links.

Booked and Busy

In the last few years, I’ve reignited my love of reading. Like most people, I’ve been tracking the books I’ve read and the books I want to read (TBR) via Goodreads and Storygraph. And as much as I love being able to have the information ready, I’ve been longing to track things in an analog way. This year I decided to keep a book journal.

I’m kind of impressed that I’ve been able to keep it for three months. More than that, I actually enjoy it!

So far, it’s just been basic stats, short reviews, and lists of books I’d like to read but I love having a place where I can put all of my bookish thoughts.

Join me on Goodreads and Storygraph

Worn|| Tulle the Point

If you had told me five years ago, I would be having another crisis of personal style because my days would be spent in comfy clothes that hide baby puke, I wouldn’t have believed you, yet, here we are.

When our daughter told us she was pregnant, I happily volunteered to watch our grandson during the day when she went back to work. I’m over the moon that I get to spend so much quality time with him. But just when I pulled myself out of a style rut that comes with being a stay-at-home to a young kiddo, my days are now spent taking care of the cutest 5-month-old ever. And that means comfortable and spit-up resistant. It also means that I relish the chance to dress up a little whenever possible.

Saturday we were lucky enough to help a friend celebrate his 5oth birthday. Is pink tulle kind of over the top? Absolutely. Did I wear it anyway? Also, absolutely.

I tried to tone it down by adding a puffer vest and sneakers. I like the way it turned out.

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Generation Inspiration

I’ve had a pair of vegan leather- pleather for all the GenXers in the crowd- on my Pinterest board for a few years. I’ve had them in various online shopping carts for months. For whatever reason, I couldn’t click buy. Maybe it was the thrifting gods whispering “we got you” in my ear. But, a few months ago I went thrifting with my daughter, and there they were. The perfect size, exactly what I was looking for, and only 7.99.

I will confess that most days I wear a uniform that consists of leggings and a sweater. If I’m feeling fancy, I swap out the leggings for a pair of jeans. I’m trying to force myself out of this rut. What’s the point in buying things I love if I never wear them?

First, I styled them in the way I would most likely wear them- blouse, trench, and heels. Classic and appropriate for most occasions, although I would probably swap out the stilettos for something with a chunky heel if I was headed out for the day with my 8-year-old.

Then I got some fit inspo from the Tik Tok generation. This time I paired them with a chunky sweater, a hat, and my Air Force 1s. I gotta say the kids are alright because I really like this!